Those who God has joined together,
let no one put asunder

CHRISTIAN MARRIAGE

Christian marriage is a solemn and public covenant between a man and a woman made in the presence of God. The marriage ceremony is a public ratification of this covenant in the presence of witnesses. When the Church presides at the marriage ceremony, it serves as the witness of the covenant and through its priest bestows blessing on the union, with prayer that the parties concerned may receive grace to fulfill their vows of fidelity and to create a Christian family and home.

The intention of marriage means not only a lifelong relationship of personal commitment, it also means that in marriage a means to spiritual growth and ministry has been created. Husband and wife intend to help nurture each other's relationship with God and, together, the married couple seeks to find ways to support and nurture family and community life. To these ends a man and woman seeking marriage come to the Church for counsel and God's blessing on their union.

We are providing you this information as a convenient means of answering many questions you may have about marriage in this parish and to acquaint you with the norms at St. Andrew's Episcopal Church. We want this to be your wedding therefore, please feel free to discuss with the clergy or the wedding coordinator any questions or concerns you might have.

Divorce: If either party has been divorced, 180 days must elapse prior to marriage in the Episcopal Church. A copy of the last page of the Divorce Decree, containing the date of divorce, court and judge, must be provided for the wedding file. If either party has been divorced more than once, an application for a judgment of marital status must be filed with the Bishop. The Bishop will have 30 days to issue a judgment on the application.

Counseling: The Church requires that there be counseling with the clergy prior to a marriage service. At St. Andrew's counseling is provided during marriage preparation weekends which take place three times each year. At these retreats, couples gather for a Saturday and Sunday morning to learn about themselves, about being a couple, and to share fellowship within the Church community.

Organist: Appointments will need to be made directly with the organist to determine musical selections. Rehearsals with musicians and soloists will be set up with the organist. If you decide to have additional musicians, please have the organist for your wedding contact them regarding selections and rehearsal times.

Flowers: The following guidelines for floral arrangements need to be honored.
If using Church vases, the florist is responsible for obtaining the liners from the Church ahead of time. The flowers are to be left on the altar for the Sunday worship service. A notice will be printed in the bulletin with the other flower donations for that Sunday.

No decorations other than the altar flowers are permitted inside the Communion Rail. You may arrange for whatever flowers, greenery, ribbons, etc. you like in the rest of the nave. Only the Altar Guild may place the floral arrangements on the Altars or remove them or remove them after the service.

The bride is responsible for cleaning up all of the decorations outside the Altar rail immediately following the service in the nave and chapel. This is not a responsibility of the Sexton or the Altar Guild. Check with your florist. An additional fee will be charged if the parish staff or sexton needs to clean in any area of the church after the wedding.

You may attach floral arrangements or bows to the ends of the pews. However, please do not use any kind of tape since it leaves marks.

During Holy Days (Thanksgiving, Christmas, and Easter) the Church is to remain decorated with the festival flowers and arrangements; therefore, if a wedding is scheduled at this time, no special wedding flowers will be permitted.

Candles: The Church has available four options for candles. You may choose any or all of the options.

• Altar Candles - 2 - 7-branch brass candelabra
• Two 5 ft. high, 7-branch wedding candelabra that may be placed on either side
of the high altar.
• 2 Eucharistic candles will be used when there is Communion at the wedding.
• Wrought iron sconce candles may be used, and the sconces decorated.
The sconces are located on the pillars in the nave.
• Unity candles are not part of the wedding liturgy in the Episcopal Church and
are therefore not permitted.

Photographers: In order not to distract from the wedding and the solemnity and beauty of the ceremony, photographs are not permitted during the service. The service begins when the bride walks down the aisle.

The Jewell Room, adjacent to the Bride's Room, is an ideal setting for wedding photographs. We suggest that the photographer and the bride agree on the arrangements. NO FURNITURE IS TO BE MOVED UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCE

Photographs may not be taken inside the Nave or Chapel during any part of the wedding ceremony.

Photographers may not come into the Nave to take a picture of the bride coming down the aisle.

A flash picture may be taken from the Narthex at the end of the ceremony as the bride and groom leave the Nave.

Flash pictures may be taken in the Chancel up to 30 minutes prior to the wedding and fifteen minutes after the ceremony is finished and the guests have left. If requested, the clergy will be glad to participate in the reconstruction of any part of the ceremony for photographic purposes.

No one is permitted behind the Altar rail at any time except clergy, acolytes, and Altar Guild members.

Rearrangement of Altar flowers and candelabra for photographic purposes is not permitted.

The Church will be opened two hours prior to the wedding by the sexton assigned to the wedding. If more time is desired an additional fee will be required. The Altar Guild will arrive one hour and fifteen minutes prior to the wedding in order for the Altar to be ready for photographs one hour prior to the service.

The Altar Guild will leave the flowers and candles on the altar for 20 minutes after the guests leave for additional photographs.

Program: Should you desire a printed program for your wedding service, please contact the wedding coordinator for a template. You will need to submit a draft of the program two weeks prior to the wedding for approval by the officiant.

Wedding Arrangements: The bride and her attendants may dress at the Church. We suggest that the men dress at home. The church will be open for two hours before the wedding to provide ample time for dressing and taking pictures. Outside bridal consultants are welcome to assist the bridal party only in the room assigned for dressing. The officiant assigned to the wedding will direct the wedding rehearsal and the procession.

A State of Missouri Marriage License must be delivered to the wedding coordinator at the rehearsal. Please allow sufficient time for obtaining the license, bearing in mind, state as well as federal holidays.

The wedding guidelines at St. Andrew's Church do NOT allow for throwing of any rice, birdseed or confetti in the Church or on the Church grounds.

Please inform your bridal party and guests that NO ALCOHOLIC BEVERAGES are allowed on Church property at any time during the rehearsal or the wedding. This includes the parking lot!

We suggest the guest register be closed five minutes before the wedding so that all guests may be seated in time for the beginning of the ceremony.

It is very appropriate to ask family members or friends to read Lessons at the service. The reader should be someone who can read Scripture clearly and one for whom it has meaning in faith. Readers normally sit in the congregation and come to the Lectern to read the Lesson. The reader should attend the rehearsal. It is appropriate for the Eucharist to be celebrated at the wedding. If you choose to have Communion at the wedding or rehearsal, all guests will be invited to receive Communion.

A separate appointment will be made with the organist at St. Andrew's to help you select music, soloists, and musicians for your wedding. Music selections will need to be approved by the music director and the clergy performing the ceremony.

Fees: The fee for a wedding at St. Andrew’s is $1200. This fee includes clergy, organist, Altar Guild, Sextons, Acolytes and all other fees. Additional fees will be charged for soloist, musicians and extra musical rehearsals. $600 is due when you schedule your wedding and the balance of $600 is due 10 days prior to your wedding.

Membership Requirements: In order to hold a wedding at Saint
Andrew's, one person of the couple must be a communicant in good standing at St. Andrew's or have a primary family member who is a member.

Feel free to contact Fr. Mann's assistant, Mary Sanders, or Mother Anne Hutchersonfor more information; either can help you in making arrangements for your wedding, including working with the Altar Guild, Acolytes, Sexton and other necessary appointments. At the time of scheduling your wedding date a $600 deposit is due with 10 days to hold the date.

09.11.2005